erindizmo asked: You absolutely do not ship... Coulson/Justin Hammer. :D
You are completely correct: I do not, in fact, ship Coulson/Justin Hammer.
I am treasuring the idea of Coulson going to assess him for SHIELD though. Hammer would make him sit in a waiting room, just to impress upon him the level to which he has Better Things To Do- those things are mostly rip off Tony Stark and play with his executive ball clicker. And Coulson would very calmly wait, and wait, and then he would sit through Hammer’s grandstanding, and then he would go home and give Nick Fury such an evil look for making him go through that- because Fury would already know, obviously, that he was all smoke and mirrors.
It would be glorious.